As soon as MacKay heard the doorbell ring, he bolted up the stairs in a panic, stumbling toward the top and falling face-first onto the carpeted landing of the second floor hallway.
“Son of a bitch, McKay was heard to scream,” he yelled.
He cursed the contractor for adding the two extra steps to accommodate the high ceilings of the McMansion. Then he dashed to the big window that looked out to the front yard, and looked down to the entrance of the house. It was his daughter, Lauren. That was bad enough. But it was even worse. She had some guy with her, and her stupid dog.
He looked at the guy, and he knew exactly what this little visit about. Then he looked at the annoying dog. A gigantic mass of orangish fur with it’s big tail flapping back and forth. He wondered if his daughter ever went anywhere without the obnoxious Golden Dinkle Doodle, or whatever the hell it was.
“Jack, are you okay?” Sue called up to him.
“Sources say McKay responded in a sharp tone when questioned by his wife. Hell no, I’m not okay, he said. And we have new information now available — it appears Lauren McKay was behind the ringing of the doorbell. And in a startling development, it appears she’s brought some loser to the McKay house. And he has a beard. Lauren McKay’s father was said to be visibly shaken by the development.”
Sue came up the stairs saying, “Jack, take it easy. I totally forgot to mention to you that Lauren called earlier. She said she wanted to bring a friend by. And Jack, I think actually he’s more than a friend. I think it’s her boyfriend. But don’t blame her. I forgot to mention it to you with all the uh, you know, confusion since you got home.”
MacKay looked at his wife and waved his hands wildly and pointed to his mouth. He realized he had become quite adept at non-verbal communication in the last few hours.
“I’ll just say you’re not feeling well,” Sue said.
Before he could respond, he heard the front door open.
“Hey, guys,” his daughter said, coming inside. “The door was unlocked and –“
The young woman never had a chance to finish as her father bellowed in his anchorman’s voice. “This just in to the newsroom. Breaking news. A tragic story developing at the McKay house. Lauren McKay is inside the house. I repeat, she is inside the house.”
Sue hurried down the stairs, waving to her daughter, and trying to talk over her husband. “Lauren, hi…”
“Hey…mom,” Lauren said, bewildered and staring up the stairs at her father.
“Cool,” the guy behind her said, “it’s like having an anchorman robot at home.”
The large, bushy dug pushed past everyone, and bounded up the steps barking and racing toward McKay like it was a game.
“Ludwig, no,” Lauren yelled.
McKay turned and ran for the master bedroom, screaming the whole way. “A shocking new development. A large, stupid dog has broken free inside the house.”
Lauren looked at Sue and said, “Uh, mom what on earth –“
Upstairs, her father’s voice filled the hallway. “You are looking at live pictures of an apparently rabid animal chasing Jack McKay.”
“Hey, can I jump in here?” the guy with the beard asked. “I can be like a co-anchor, or a reporter.”
McKay raced down the long hallway to the master bedroom, cursing the contractor for making the house so long. His eyes were fixed on the door to the bedroom. If he could just get inside, he would slam the door on the dog, and maybe break the animal’s snout, if he was lucky. That would teach his daughter to keep the crazed canine on a leash when she visited.
He crossed into the room, turned to close the door, and saw the dog launch itself at him.
“The canine is attacking,” he yelled, as the dog knocked him over.
McKay fell backward, his head hitting the floor. Then things went black for a moment.
Sue and Lauren raced into the room and knelt beside him.
“Jack,” Sue said. “Jack, can you hear me?”
He did indeed hear her, and he heard his daughter say, “I’m so sorry, dad.”
He felt Ludwig’s sloppy, wet tongue lapping at his cheeks, and he slowly opened his eyes to see the three of them staring down at him. Lauren yanked her dog away from him and everyone was quiet for a moment, waiting for him to say, or do something.
“Why don’t you lay down for a bit, Jack,” Sue said.
He nodded his approval and he saw his wife turn to the other two and cover for him. “Dad had a pretty busy morning at work.”
“What was that whole thing with the voice?” Lauren asked.
“Oh, it’s part of this new exercise some consultant has them doing, staying in their on-air persona at home. It helps deepen the voice, or something.”
“That is wild,” the guy with the beard said.
Hours later, Jack McKay awoke from a deep sleep, washed up and changed. It was after three when he went downstairs and found Sue, alone in the kitchen.
“Welcome back,” she said.
He sat down at the table and she brought him a glass of water, then sat down across from him.
“So, I have some real news for you,” she said. “Lauren came by with that young man, his name is Doug by the way, to introduce him to us.”
Jack drank some water, but said nothing. He already knew where this was going. He had seen his daughter earlier today, meeting a girlfriend in a coffee shop near work as he was leaving. His daughter and her friend hugged, and there were laughs and smiles and the kind of giddiness that accompanies the sharing of big news. A big announcement. The big news was confirmed when from across the street he saw Lauren place her hand in the other girl’s hand, and show off what had to be a ring.
He had been hungry and tired when he left work, and wanted somewhere to process what he had seen when he stopped into the diner for something to eat. He didn’t want Lauren getting married, especially to someone they had never met.
“Lauren, really wanted to tell you in person, Jack, but Doug is someone pretty special to her.”
He nodded and said, “I know. They’re getting married, right?”
Sue smiled and said, “Well look who can speak like a regular non-TV person again.”